Living with grief can be difficult. The sadness, the aching, the dread – for some it feels like a hole in the gut and for others like your heart is broken into a thousand pieces. Some days you might feel like you are “doing okay” whereas other days are a moment-to-moment struggle. When special days or holidays approach, the anticipation alone can intensify your feelings. Also included here are “Dates of Acknowledgement” such as the date of diagnosis, for example, or the date of the death or funeral.

Many years ago, it was common to experience major losses in younger years, even as children. Back then people lived and died at home, with several generations living together in the same house or neighborhood. Even the youngest children were around to see and experience the death of family members.

Coping strategies can help you manage when grief becomes overwhelming. You might use them in preparation for upcoming events or known difficult days (birthdays, holidays, anniversaries). Coping strategies can also help you prepare as you purposefully lean into your grief and explore difficult feelings and memories.

Getting to know your own grief can help you feel less startled by what often feels like unusual and uncontrolled reactions. It’s important to allow yourself to grieve, and getting to know your grief will help you learn how to cope while allowing yourself the time and space to grieve.